Confessions (397) by Saint Augustine


Confessions (397) by Saint Augustine

As the title implies, this book consists mainly of Saint Augustine’s reflections on the wrongs he’s done, past and present, as he implores God for forgiveness and the strength to lead a moral life. I don’t know what compelled him to publicly document his sins this way, but it reveals a level of honesty and strength of character that I could never hope to achieve (though I certainly aspire to). And I assume that touches on the impetus here - as a reader, I’m compelled to amend my own faults and emulate Augustine as an example of someone who, thanks to God’s intercession and his own resolve, evolved past his shortcomings into an incredibly holy and admirable man.

One of the more powerful assertions Augustine makes in regard to his conversion is that it wasn’t achieved by his own strength or by a victory of his own will, but by the strength of God working through him. Which, although it may not appeal to the pride of our own capabilities for change, proves the comforting and empowering truth that, even when we don’t feel strong enough to make ourselves better people, God is always strong enough to do so on our behalf (provided we’re willing to let Him).

Beyond the penitent content in Confessions, Augustine narrates his way through several philosophical topics as well, as they relate to his spiritual growth. For example, he refutes the existence of evil as some kind of opposing force to God’s goodness. And as far as I understand - the idea is that evil is nothing more than a lack of God in the first place. When we do wrong, we aren’t giving-in to the dark half of a binary power dynamic, but rather we’re willfully distancing ourselves from God’s goodness. And on the subject of distance from God, Augustine elaborates on His nature as a concept difficult to grasp in physical, corporeal terms. God fills His creation, for example - but not in the way of matter proportionally filling a vessel as we know it. It’s essentially beyond our grasp, as is the concept of God’s existence beyond time, a construct of His own making that He isn’t beholden to. Augustine even delves into several other tangential philosophical debates, like the function of memory and how the mind can somehow recall abstract concepts like forgetfulness that are completely contrary to their own retention.

Saint Augustine dissects his own thoughts and rationale to the smallest minutiae - sometimes to the detriment of sanity, if I’m giving an honest assessment. I can’t help but feel his resulting penitential self-denial passes beyond God’s ideals, as Augustine seems to make concerted efforts to avoid even the most innocuous pleasures, like music - whereas I’m inclined to believe such innocent recreation is God’s gift for us to enjoy rather than abstain from, in constant fear of worldly snares pulling us away from His will. I also have concerns about Saint Augustine’s idea of truth and its interpretation. As he concludes Confessions with an extended reflection on the Creation account in Genesis, he insists on the validity of various understandings of God’s Word. In the context of his own examples, this claim holds up - but taken as a universally applicable concept, I believe there is a very real danger of false interpretations of God’s truth being misconstrued as correct. Jesus’s own words could be understood as a horrible perversion of their true meaning if taken out of context or interpreted completely literally, for example.

All that being said - Confessions has given me a great sense of respect for Saint Augustine, his philosophies, and his conversion. And I’m compelled to follow his example to lead a good, spiritually-facing life myself - as I assume was his intention for readers of these candid reflections. I know I’ll never be Saint Augustine, but this book inspires some confidence that if I’m open to God’s intercession, I can at least come close.

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